Why we eloped - Part 1
BoHo Cornwall Elopements is 10 years old this year!!
As part of our 10th birthday celebrations, we put out a message on social media, asking our BoHo couples if they would like to share with us and everyone, their reasons for choosing an elopement wedding.
Everyone's different of course and it's so interesting to see what motivated some of our couples to come away and elope! Vanessa and Michelle
"The thought of a idyllic wedding in Cornwall was for a long time quite unrealistic.
Both my wife and I have complicated family backgrounds.
The thought of a big family wedding filled us both with dread.
So after 15 years of engagement we were unsure we would ever make it happen.
We then came across beautiful Boho and thought it was the most wonderful and magical place.
The thought of running away to Cormwall and be married in a place we could be really comfortable, without the expectation of normal conformities was perfect.
My wife has autism. So loud, booze filled parties with lots of people were never an option. So when we found Boho , we could do our wedding our way.
Our day in Spring 2019 was absolutely perfect. Maya and Tom were wonderfully accommodating and we couldn’t have asked for a more comfortable experience.
We decided to have 6 guests, as seeing my mum’s excitement when we told her we were eloping made me realise we needed her there.
We drank tea in Cornish mugs for a wedding drink, whilst our guests enjoyed a glass of champagne. We had our photos taken on a Cliff, then on the beach. Then our wedding breakfast.. a Cornish Cream Tea over looking the sea.
Marrying the person you love should be one of the happiest days of your life, not the most stressful.
Eloping was the best decision we ever made.
No one should have to conform with “normal” wedding pressures on one of the most memorable days of your life. Eloping gave us freedom to be ourselves and we would do it all again!”
Melanie and Jason
"Jason and I married at Boho in 2018. We can honestly say this was the best decision we made for us and apart from the days when our children were born this was was of the best days of our life. Here's why;
We had both been married before and I had also worked for years as a wedding florist so had both personal and professional experience of traditional expensive weddings. I would say for most couples, including us first time round, their experience is like this; The planning starts off with giddy excitement, you are living your dream but in the vast majority of cases the excitement is quickly replaced by stress and disappointment as the bills and the responsibilities add up. Once the dress is chosen the big day is not really about the couple any more but about keeping other people happy; However you are in too deep to back out. You have the father who has always dreamed of seeing his daughter as a bride, the mother who has longed for this big day as much as she did for her own and can't wait to invite her friends, and not forgetting the enthusiastic gang of mates who simply cannot wait to organise the most legendary of hen and stag parties. Besides you've seen enough wonderfully posh venues to convince yourself that nothing else would possibly do. Drunk on your Pinterest boards you have persuaded yourself that your really need the seductive faffy decor, the one choice for everyone sit down meal with it's artistic presentation, the corny speeches, endless group photos and small talk. All the things that when you do look back on after the big day you wonder why you chose a traditional wedding. Because despite what you had read no guest really did talk about the marquee decorations for weeks on end, and the reception won't go down in living memory as the best party anyone has ever been to. It was just another wedding for most of them. The whole day whizzed by so fast it was over before you could say 'champagne for everyone!' You realise that you were so busy making small talk with your guests that you didn't even really have a conversation with your spouse all day. There is this niggle hanging in the air that maybe you didn't have to spend all that money or endure all that planning stress but you are not sure whether you should admit it!
Traditional weddings are big business and the people who run them and the suppliers they work with are only too keen to line their pockets with the eye watering fees they charge by convincing couples that the more you spend on your wedding the more you can demonstrate to your guests how amazing your relationship truly is. This is one of the biggest commercial lies of modern times-the bigger the wallet, then the bigger your love story must be! Just look at the couples on the venue's instagram feed!
This modern extortion in the wedding industry has detracted from the true meaning and purpose of love and marriage which is two people that love each other and just want to spend the rest of their lives together. Until recently the essential big traditional wedding idea has been sold to couples everywhere with no questions asked. Then came the pandemic and many venues doubled or tripled their previous huge price tags to make up for lost revenue. Now we have the cost of living crisis which means that more couples are putting on the brakes, taking time to think and do their own research rather than rushing to sign contracts at show round appointments.
The cost of living crisis is not going to stop couples getting engaged or planning an amazing day but it will make couples think more carefully about the choices they are making. They will be less likely to saddle themselves with enormous bills for things they don't actually need and look for alternative ways of getting married in style. The elopement wedding-once the choice of couples marrying in disapproval is fast becoming a trend that is showing no signs of slowing down. If you can take all the most desirable parts of the wedding; the dress, the romantic vows, photographs in a breath taking setting, uninterrupted 1.1 time with your new spouse and you can do all this without the hefty price tag (and still have a hen and stag or have a party for friends and family as an option for when you get back) then what's not to love!”
Tashya and Ben
Image: Couple's own
"It’s a mixture of factors really, but I always knew if I ever chose to get married , I didn’t want a big wedding. I can get quite anxious in social situations and don’t enjoy having my photo taken , so the thought of everyone looking at me was unbearable. Whilst I’ve loved attending my friends weddings and saw how much it meant to them , the thought of so much expense for one day was always mind blowing to me. The deciding factor came after losing my dad back in 2015. I knew if I had a typical wedding , I would feel a huge part missing every step of the way - no matter how much time had passed, I would miss his presence too much. I think the pandemic made it easier to deal with the questions of “why” from friends and family. It totally removed the option of a big wedding and therefor , the stress of the unknown, getting covid and possibility of cancellation. Cornwall is my home county so I’m not sure we can technically call it “eloping” - but it meant a lot to have a day that was just about us , exactly how we wanted it , in the place that we loved!”
Monica & John (and Isabelle)
"After 18 years of being together, and having our daughter, we decided to finally get married. We originally booked with you for 2020. Covid then cancelled that. We rearranged for 2021. We eloped because I didn’t want a big fancy wedding, and all the stress and ridiculous costs that go with it. To be centre of attention is not me. My nerves and anxiety would have been through the roof, to stand up in front of people, to say my vows, possibly a small speech, everyone looking at me… I found it hard enough in front of 5? ( Maya, Tom, 3 registrars - maybe one other, sorry) We had a lovely stress free day. To get married shows your love and commitment to each other. You should plan a wedding as you want to as a couple. Not what everyone else wants you to do. I’ve read stories on how couples are pushed into having a huge wedding… No thank you We had the perfect wedding. I wouldn’t change a single thing.”